I got a job in a casino. I was so happy. I came across really prime men and women. Their expensive scents sat heavy in the air. They also liked their gin neat and popped off their cigars in really cool aesthetic ashtrays. See one night during my shift I happened to drop an ashtray which was actually full on this nice gent. Everything went dark for a moment and tell you what,this nice gent smiled and said it was fine. The next day I was fired,the customer allegedly filed a complaint of being mishandled! Such petty hypocritical humans! I am so embarassed of how I left this place dry like the martini these rich gents liked. Anyway,I have athis chain that I had custome made from this really cool online store,it reads gemini. One thing,I am not really into horoscopes but it feels really cool having a chain with my zodiac sign on it. Hence the title” gemini is back”,pretty creative right? I hope to see you tomorrow so I can tell you more about Elizabeth,I really like her. See you soon and remember I really like you.
I want a picture. I want to break the internet. I want the likes to pour in like never before. Don’t forget about the comments too . Yes I am a millennial and social media is everything to me. Hell, how am I supposed to even live without social media. But here comes the gamble. You see the society as a whole calls for a whole new level perfection. A little perfect nose. Almond eyes. Clear skin. Lean face. The definition of beautiful in this society is perfection. For you to be considered a ‘cutie’, you need to look a certain way. You actually need to fit in their perspective. Thing is social media has made a way for us to cover our flaws. For that dainty nose. For the clear spectacular eyes. For the perfect skin with no single pore. Filters. Now you can look ‘prettier’ without having to spend money (I think this should be their motto haha) . I mean we can’t all be Kardashians walking around getting a new organ anytime we want one(it’s like going shopping for a new eye,new nose, must be nice huh?). Ever noticed how these filters change our appearances?Let’s get real though,I’ll use a snap chat filter and get pretty as hell but again that’s not me! It’s like Cinderella’s godmother waving her wand and poof! I have the glass shoe and then again poof! Back to the ghetto. Anytime I pull my phone to my face I won’t want to see my nose the way it is… I’ll want the snap chat nose. I’ll want my photographer to edit everything. My waist should be slimmer. Oh my butt should be humongous. Yeah you can’t judge me cause it’s my life and my body. You have no right. If you think am living a lie then shove your opinion up your ass! See that’s what I’d say. But trust me at the end of the day when I sit down,I am broken. I know what am presenting is an imposter. It bites and eats me up. It’s like am sinking into this endless abyss full of darkness. I am flawed, but I can’t embrace these flaws. I think they are a punishment. I post alot of perfection and bliss online, but in real life am a mess. See that’s what most of us depict for these strangers online. It’s like we are hooked. We are addicted. We as the society have tarnished the meaning of beauty. Beauty is not defined by appearance. Beauty is everything. We are crashing ourselves. I think we should make it a norm to appreciate flaws. I think it’s draining to be ‘perfect’. Snap out of that fantasy. See the other day I was looking at memes and I came across one that really cracked me up,but also gave me a stream of thoughts. It said ‘nkikuja kukutana na wewe ujue sibebi mafilter’. Wow! We have actually cultured the filter thing. I long for the days when filters and photoshop did not exist (well I am a victim), but si ni life! Seriously though, am in the process of snapping out of it and I hope you do too.
I could actually talk all day about getting yourself a dose of vitamin self love, because at one point in my life I lacked and it was like succumbing to hate coming from within. It is a vital vitamin. Yes am calling it a vitamin because it is, don’t argue with me! I hope you drink water today and give yourself a boost with a positive complement. I love you.
So I’m walking home from school. It’s really hot and am reaching to grab a water bottle from my school bag. I’m ravaging through my bag(you know how handbags are, things get lost in there and when you are cleaning out you retrieve alot of stuff you thought you had lost). So am getting really frustrated because seriously a water bottle is of reasonable size and still my hand cannot get hold of it. So I decide to sit down. Around Alliance France there is some building with some sort of bench. So am seated there drinking my water and then it hits me. That was a view point!Let me enlighten you, if you are an observer like me you should totally try out that bench. So before me are people. Nairobi recidents. Staying in Nairobi is not for the weak of heart. Everybody in the CBD is on a mission. I spot this young man. He’s on the look out. He wears an old bucket hat with rusty dungeress. He hasn’t even got a shirt inside(probably his excuse is that it was hot). He is closely following a plump lady who looked weirdly pale for such a hot day. Something tells me this lady is about to lose her expensive handbag and true to my instincts, in an instant, this lady is robbed of her expensive ‘Gucci’ bag. (it’s in quotes cause again, this is Nairobi). The street thief disappears into the next street. These people are masters of the CBD,catching them is as hard as attempting to get rid of a family of roaches from your house (haha really funny). I look around and the woman is still standing aghast. She is stricken. Even in this solemn moment she is still pale,so weird cause I thought she’d have turned blood shot red because of anger. No one actually noticed that she had been robbed of her sweet accessory. Again this is Nairobi for you. I feel like I’ve had enough rest. So I get up and start trekking again. This time towards the bus station because that is where matatus from where I come from are. Tell you what, when I was new in Nairobi, I used to really wonder why these matatus couldn’t just drop you where you estimated to go? Like I could come from home and be dropped off at GPO or the bus station and I had to walk all the way to my destination. Again, leaving in the city is not as luxurious as it may be depicted. So I keep walking and in my mind the scenario can’t stop replaying. It’s taunting me and I have to let it out in some way. So I call my mum and tell her about the little trauma of the pale lady and she tells me to be careful(she’s such a caring soul). So now am inside the matatu when the ‘konkodi’ (conductor) starts walking around collecting fare. I look at him and he’s an interesting young boy. He’s got silver things on his teeth – honestly don’t know what they are called. He’s got dreadlocks and his ears are pierced. He also has so many rings on his short stubby fingers, and he’s aggressive. He looks sick but still chews a huge ball of jaba (miraa). Mbogi genje song is playing so loudly inside the matatu and all I can think about is alighting. He takes my fare and winks at me and I frown. See I was told hii Nairobi konkodis are the elite bad boys. Am not even kidding about this I once heard a woman in a saloon saying how her daughter had disappeared with some konkodi because he used to give her free rides. Nothing is free in Nairobi my people! You have to give ceasor what belongs to ceasor. In this city alot goes on. Alot of hustling. The CBD is full of broke men in suits looking for a way to sustain them and theirs (sad). The Jevanjee gardens is full of people. People trying to cure their turmoil by looking at the little nature that exists around. Being a hopeless romantic is hard in this city. You blink and another pretty girl with a neon dress and Fila sneakers has filled in for you. Everybody is trying to do something in this city. When we were young it was our biggest dream to come to the city(well maybe mine only) but the Nairobi that existed in my mind was all a house of cards. Don’t get me wrong hii Nairobi yetu is still one of the best places to be,the gamble is that you need the mula to experience Nairobi.So after alot of traffic jam I get home. I’m happy but tired. I just want to shower. I get in the bathroom turn on the shower, nothing comes out. Oh yeah, it escaped me. Water rationing by the kanjo. But hii ni Nairobi! Am off to buy water. See you next time.
Hello There! What can I say.. Am a little proud of you for coming to my blog. Trust me am clapping for you right now. I talk alot. That’s one thing about me. The talking is expressed through writing though. My personality category is shy. I was born a writer. I was born to talk through the pen. Brilliant right? Anyway welcome to freespace. This is the right place for you. I’ve got alot of things lined up for you guys. To help you get through your days. I’m really funny (atleast to myself). One of my goals is cracking up your ribs. Laughter is a relief. I won’t say much in this intro but am just hoping that we walk through this journey together. On my next post I’ll tell you details about me. I love being mysterious. It just juices things up you know? I’ll tell you what made me start freespace and why it’s called freespace. I’m teary right now. Because am concluding and I have to leave you guys. I’m making tea and if it dares overflow out of the sufuria my mother will literally pluck my hairs one by one. You know how milk behaves. See you next time. ❤️❤️❤️